peletiier:

" the timing's never right. "

jcstafriend-archive-blog1:

halsey ‘badlands’ starter sentences

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       maybe it’s because she’s trying so HARD to deny it; perhaps it’s not the time at all but the people. on many an occasion,  eric has shared stories, elbowed aaron whenever he mentioned inviting daryl over for dinner, usually followed by the ever-implying lift of his left eyebrow, one corner of his mouth rising into a smile. it’s how it always is when they get their redneck friend to drag carol along for spaghetti tuesdays, as glenn had dubbed it. except this time, eric is blabbering on about cars the ENTIRE time and then looping his arm through daryl’s to force him out the door into the garage– leaving aaron and carol along in silence. so, they’re stuck, spinning pasta around their forks but not talking, until she does, and he just listens.

      “ the timing’s never right. ” she says. except she says it only once, slightly beneath her breath, followed by a sigh, an unsteady laugh. they’re so in-love that it hurts to see them apart; for aaron to watch daryl wave goodbye to carol, for them to part ways, to do their own thing. there’s always the same familiar ache that takes up residence inside of him. but god, he loves carol, too. not in the same way, the love that is reserved for eric, but in a way where he wants to always be near her, wants her to be safe and away from harm– like the way he loves daryl and jessie, not like how he once loved him mother or loves eric. not like that. this is a different love entirely.

    “ the timing’s never right. “ he grits his teeth when she says it again, like maybe he hadn’t heard the first time. he wants to tell her that the timing is right but she is all wrong; she is all bone and facades, a bruise that never fades and a broken limb that never heals just quick right. he doesn’t. but mostly because eric would slap him upside the head if he knew what he was thinking. instead he nods, eats some spaghetti so he can fill the silence with the sound of chewing, and tries to think of something to say. it has to be poetic, it has to be kind AND loving, like the way a too-large sweater fits on the frame on someone who is two sizes too small to even fit their way into it; like a skeleton too large for skin. most of what he deducts from this small conversation is that his inner dialogue could use some work.

“ he loves you– daryl. “ everyone knows it, they just don’t say it. “ he’s just not good with his feelings. “ she of all people should understand that; she does, he know she does. daryl loves carol in all the ways you can love a person, a kind of love that even aaron himself is envious of. when they stare at each other or their hands brush, he finds himself filled with emptiness, trying to think of ways he could get them together. a plan. a way. anything to get them to realise how much they mean to each other. when he opens his mouth, kindness doesn’t come out, nothing like the benevolence he was hoping for. “ the timing is right, carol. everything else is wrong. “ the end of the world; meeting when there is no possible way for any new relationship to thrive for long. everything is so wrong. but they’re in-love and even that can stand against the harshest of things. they’ll make it. aaron knows they will.

  
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CAROL PELETIER.

private. semi-exclusive. mutuals only.

written by. sophia

#peletiier

EST. october '15.
RE-EST. october '16.

STATS.

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